Promises Unspoken
by that girl65
Summary: FORMELY KNOWN AS:A Confusing Love Lizzie has the perfect life. A good job, and a loving fiancee. But when a Hillridge reunion comes, will Lizzie and Gordo's buried love be unsurfaced? Life as she used to know it, will come crashing to the ground. LG l
1. The Invitation Lizzie

A/N:Hey, everyone! this is just an idea that came to me one day so I decided, why not give it a shot. But I dunno how well itll go since I have like, 4 other stories i'm trying to finish also. Anywho, R & R! mel  
  
DISCLAIMER:I OWN NOTHING  
  
Chapter 1: The Invatation-Lizzie  
  
Dear Elizabeth McGuire,  
  
You are invited to attend Hillridge Highschools ten year  
  
reunion. Please join us on the eighth of June in the HHS  
  
gym. we hope you can join us.  
  
I read the invitation with a growing sense of excitement. It was hard to believe it had already been ten years since I left highschool. I remembered the day well.  
  
{FLASHBACK}  
  
It was the nighth after the graduation and me, Gordo, and Miranda sat in my bedroom floor talking. "I can't believe were going to college," Miranda said excitedly. "I know, it feels like we just got out of middle school," I said taking a bite of ice cream.  
  
"I just wish we were all going to the same college," Gordo said playing with the carpet. My once soaring heart crashed to the ground. I had been trying to forget about that, but I guess it was a good thing he brought it up. It's not like I could've ignored it forever, we were leaving in a month!  
  
"Or at least all in California," I voiced looking up at Gordo's handsome figure. His eyes met mine and I felt my heart flutter. Leaving Gordo would probably be the hardest, I mean, I loved Miranda to death, I really did, but Gordo...I couldn't explain it.  
  
"I know, Gordo's going to Harvard, your going to NYU and I'm going to Washington," Miranda said sadly. "But we'll always be friends, right?" I said finally tearing my eyes away from Gordo.   
  
"Of coarse," Gordo said smiling. "Hey, Lizzie, do you mind if I take a shower? I smell really bad," Miranda asked me crinkling up her nose. "Go ahead," I laughed.   
  
Miranda went into the bathroom leaving me and Gordo alone in my room. I sighed and leaned my head against the bed thinking about the feelings that I hide deep within the innermost thoughts of my being that I would never unveil.  
  
Gordo mistook it for nervousness about the future and inched closer to me. "Are you really that nervous?" he asked. "I'm just so scared that once we move away we'll grow apart. Who will be there to help me back up when I fall?" I asked in a litteral and nonlitteral state.  
  
"Lizzie don't worry, we'll always be friends," Gordo said cupping my face in his hand and turning my face towards him. I felt my voice catch in my throat but managed to utter a few words, "How can you be so sure?" I asked quietly.  
  
"I'm not," Gordo answered tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, "But I can be sure of one thing," he said. His face was so close that I could feel his breath play upon my face.  
  
"What's that?" I asked feeling my face turn hot. "That I love you, more than anything in the world. And I will always be there to pick you up when you fall, and to heal your wounds when your hurt. Remember, no matter how many miles may seperate us, or how many years, I've got your back, McGuire, always," he breathed. His crystal blue eyes shone with conviction. "I love you too," I whispered. Without a moment of hesitation, he leaned in and kissed her sweetly on the lips.  
  
{END FLASHBACK}  
  
Only one month after that moment, we were ripped crually from eachothers arms. But that one blissful month had kept my soul alive. At first we talked every free moment we got, whether it was be phone, email, or letter. We just looked for a way to stay connected.  
  
But soon, the calls came less frequent, and mail more scarce. I tried not to admit it, but we grew apart, even Miranda grew detached. Now it had been thirteen years since we last spoke. We were strangers. It seemed strange that three people that once knew eachother inside out now barely knew the other one, if even remembered them.  
  
The thought of Gordo and Miranda not to remember me sent a pain like a knife piercing my heart. At least I still knew somewhat of what Gordo was still up to, yeah, me and the rest of America.   
  
Gordo had, predictably, became the next Spielberg. He was on about every magazine cover you could find. On the teen magazines as the "hottest guy (and available to)" and on the other magazines trying to pry lose from him answers as to why he was never had a date to the different premiere partys and junk like that.  
  
I have no idea what Miranda's up to. I havn't seen a trace of her since she accidentaly sent me an email that was supposed to go to Veronica, who ever that is.  
  
And me, well, I have a great job as a writer for a teen magazine and I had written a few novels. And the highlight, I'm engaged to one of he sweetest guys on the planet. Tom Sullivan, owner of Fat Cat records. I met him while trying to get an interview with one of his clients.   
  
After I started going out with him, my mind began to drift farther away from the loving memories of Gordo and how much he had meant to me.   
  
I looked back at the invitation and smiled, I guess it wouldn't hurt to go, maybe I might run into Miranda. Or maybe Gordo...  
  
"No, he's out of your life," I said to myself. After all, life was going great. I had the best fiancee, the perfect job, and life couldn't get better. Little did I know that this one reunion could bring life as I knew it crashing to the ground.  
  
A/N:Well, what do ya think. If I get at least ten reviews I'll continue. so review! mel 


	2. If Only Gordo

Chapter 2: If Only-Gordo  
  
Dear David Gordon,  
  
You are invited to attend Hillridge Highschool's ten year  
  
reunion. Please join us on the eighth of June in the HHS  
  
gym. We hope you can join us.   
  
I read the invitation over and over in my mind. Had it been ten years only? It had seemed longer. Ten long years since I had last seen Lizzie. Ten long years since I had last held her in my arms and told her how much I loved her.  
  
The day we were last together in eachother's arms, that was a day that was etched in my mind forever.  
  
{FLASHBACK}  
  
I stood in the airport terminal blind to the sea of commotion that was all around me. Lizzie's face was buried in my chest, and I could feel her warm tears soak my shirt. "Why does Harvard have to be in Boston?" she muttered through her tears.  
  
I just shook my head and clung onto her tighter. Lizzie looked up at me, "Do you promise to call me everyday?" she asked offering a tired smile. "I promise," I whispered kissing her lightly.  
  
"Oh, Gordo, I never want to leave this spot," Lizzie said resting her head on my chest. "Neither do I, baby," I said. She looked up at me with a quizzical look on her face. "No one's ever called me that before," she said smiling, "it makes me feel special."  
  
"You are special," I answered her. For a minute, all the pain of leaving her evaporated as we stood in the middle of the crowd's bustling around us as we looked into eachothers eyes.  
  
"Flight 206 to Boston is now boarding," came a voice through the speakers. I closed my eyes, trying to block out all of the pain that was seeping back into me. "Gordo, what if we never talk again? Or grow apart?" Lizzie asked, her tears starting a new.  
  
"Remember what I said before, we will always be friends, no matter what, I promise," I said nestling myself in her hair inhaling her sweet scent for the last time.  
  
"Just cause you promise, doesn't mean it won't be broken," Lizzie argued shaking her head. "Lizzie have I ever broken a promise?" I asked resting my forehead against hers. "No," she admitted nuzzling her face into me neck.  
  
"Last call for flight 206, from LA to Boston," came the voice again. I pulled Lizzie away from me and held her at arms lenghth, just so I could get one last good look at her.  
  
Her golden curls framed her angelic face and her hazel eyes shone with sadness. "Your so beautiful, I said shaking my head and wiping a tear from her cheek.  
  
Lizzie blushed and smiled weakly. I swept her back into my arms and gave her a passionate kiss, knowing it was the last one I would be able give her for a long time.  
  
"I love you so much," she said when I pulled away. "I love you too," I said, my eyes never leaving hers. "I'm gonna miss hearing you say that," she whispered. I gave her one last sweet kiss and embrace before walking through the terminal doors.  
  
I looked back one last time. "Promise you'll come back to me!" she cried. "I promise, I'll always come back to you!" I said to her just as the doors closed.  
  
{END FLASHBACK}  
  
If only I had kept that promise. The most important promise he had ever made in his life he had broken. Now there was no turning back.  
  
I just got so caught up in work that I didn't have time to talk to Lizzie. It's not like I ever stopped being in love with her, it wasn't that at all.  
  
I looked at my calender, I would be in town the week of the reunion, I could go. Maybe, I thought, Lizzie still loves me.  
  
But I couldn't help but thinking about what if I had kept my promise? I shook me head, if only I had kept that promise, if only. 


	3. Nightmares of the Heart Lizzie

=in dream  
  
Chapter 3: Nightmares of the Heart-Lizzie  
  
I drove to the recording studio still thinking about the reunion. I was going to pick up Tom after hopefully making a deal with a new client. I pulled up in the front and saw Tom standing there waiting for me. He had auburn hair with gray eyes.  
  
"Hey, baby," he said climbing into the car. I cringed when when I heard the nickname. "Tom, how many times have I told you to please not call me that," I pleaded. "Sorry, I always forget," he said kissing my cheek, "but I still don't understand why you don't like that nickname."  
  
"It's complicated," I answered shaking my head and starting up the car again. That nickname, it held too many memories. Too many painful memories. "How was your day?" I asked trying to get my mind off the memories that I had done so well of keeping tucked away in the farthest corners of my mind for so long.  
  
"Good, but it got even better when I saw you," Tom answered tucking a piece of stray hair behind my ear. "You're so sweet," I said leaning over and kissing him before pulling away from the curb.   
  
"I have a highschool reunion next week," I said when we stopped at a red light, "And I was hopping that you could come with me."  
  
Tom laughed, "Why? I'm not even in your class," he asked shaking his head. "I know, but I don't want to go alone. Please," I said pouting playfully. "Sorry, I can't, I'm out of town next week," he said.  
  
I groaned as we pulled up to his house, "Are you positive you can't come?" I asked. "Positive," Tom answered kissing me sweetly before climbing out of the car. "I love you," he said through the window.  
  
"I love you too," I said smiling. "You want to go out to dinner later tonight?" Tom asked. "Sure," I answered shaking the hair from my eyes. "Great, I'll pick you up around seven," Tom said kissing me one last time before walking up to his house.  
  
See what I mean, I had the most perfect soon-to-be husband a girl could ever find. I didn't need Gordo anymore. I am over him, he was a mere childhood infatuation. Nothing more.  
  
I pulled into my apartment complex and trudged up the stairs. It was only four o'clock, I still had three hours till my date with Tom. Sighing, I sat on the couch and began flipping through the channels. After all, what else was there to do on a friday night?  
  
I finally decided on some wierd reality show with some girl trying to convince the other people that cows were really from outer space and eggs were just chicken abortions. I settled down at the end of the couch with my legs curled up to my chest and yawned. My eyes began to close when the girl said something about cottage cheese really being cow puss or something like that, I was dreaming before I heard the rest.  
  
I was in what looked like an airport terminal clinging on to someone who I recognized right away. "Gordo, don't leave me," I pleaded through my tears. He remained stone faced, looking down on me as if I were a mere begger.  
  
"I don't need you anymore, Lizzie. I'm going off to Harvard, I'm going to be a famouse director. I don't need you," he said coldly. The words peirced my heart like a knife.  
  
"Please, Gordo, say you don't mean it, I love you, I always will," I cried clinging ever tighter. "No, I mean every bit of it. I don't need you. I never did," he said throwing me off of him and walking through the terminal doors.  
  
"Gordo, please, I need you. Gordo, I love you more than anything. Come back to me," I begged as I watched him walk onto the plane and out of my life forever.   
  
"Gordo, no, I need you," I cried in my sleep as I tossed and turned on the couch, "Please, Gordo, I love you, I always will."  
  
"Liz, Liz wake up!" Tom said shaking me from my slumber. Opening my eyes, I saw my fiance in front of me and I burst into a fit of tears. "He left me, he broke his promise," I whispered to myself shaking my head.  
  
Suddenly all the emotions and memories that I had kept tucked away for so many years came pouring out through my soul. "Oh, Liz it's okay, Tom said bundling me in his arms. I felt like pulling away from him but I didn't have the energy.  
  
"Whose this, Gordo guy?" Tom asked stroking my hair. At the sound of his name I just burst into more tears. "I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," he said hugging my closer.  
  
"He broke his promise. How could you have broken your promise? Why did you do that to me?" I asked trying to control my tears.  
  
Tom put his hand on my forehead but it was immediatly jerked away. "You're burning up," he said, "I'll go get you some medicine." Tom got up and walked into the kitchen leaving me laying on the couch drowning in the memories that had haunted me before.  
  
Tom came back in with some water and medicine and sat down next to me. My crying had reduced to mere pathetic sniffles and he wiped the tears from my cheeks.  
  
"You feeling better, baby?" Tom asked sweeping the hair from my eyes. "Don't call me that!" I cried jumping up from the couch. "Sorry, I forgot. What's the big deal about it anyways?" Tom asked with a hint of anxiety in his voice.   
  
"It was what he called me, nobody had ever called me that before," I breathed. Overcome with lightheaded dizziness I collapsed back on the couch. "Liz, I have a feeling there're are a few things that your not telling me," Tom frowned though still being sympathetic, "Who's 'he'? Are you talking about that Gordo guy?"  
  
I stuck the asprin in my mouth and and took a long sip of water. I was anything but eager to explain everything to him. I knew it would reopen healed wounds.  
  
"His name was David Gordon, but we called him Gordo," I began. "What? Wait a minute, David Gordon? As in David Gordon the famouse producer?" Tom asked, his eyes wide. "Yes, now let me finish," I said unintentionally sharp.  
  
"We were best friends all our lives, and in highschool I started to develop romantic feeling for him. I started to love him," I continued quietly, "after graduation, he told me he loved me too, and we started going out.  
  
"But then we had to leave for college. He went to Harvard and I went to NYU," silent tears began to flow down my cheeks once more, "he promised me that we would never grow apart, and that he would always come back to me, no matter what. But his calls became more and more scarce and pretty soon we lost all contact with eachother," I said choking the rest out, "that was the only promise he ever broke." 


	4. Without Gordo

Chapter 4: Without  
  
"And, cut!" I said hopping off my director's chair and already heading for my car, "I'll see you guys in California, I have a plane to catch."  
  
Today was the day that I was heading back to Hillridge, my home town. I shivered in antisipation as I started my car and headed out onto the street. Hillridge was were my life had started, where everything I had known for the first eighteen years of my life started and ultimately stayed after I left for Boston.  
  
The day I walked through those terminal doors my life had changed, I'd like to say for the better but Lord knows that isn't true. How can your life change for the better when you left all you ever loved with no more than an empty promise? I asked myself.  
  
I rushed through the airport occasionally having to sign an autograph or two before finally reaching my gate. "Flight 206 from Boston to Texas now boarding," came the voice through the intercom.  
  
Sighing, I walked slowly through the terminal doors as if it would reverse all the damage I had done in the past fourteen years. Already I felt closer to Lizzie, a step closer to putting my life back on track.  
  
I sat in my seat looking out the tiny window and down at the runway at the men dressed up in flouresent orange loading the bags into the plane. "They look like traffic cones, don't they?" asked a soft voice next to him.  
  
I turned and saw a girl around twenty looking at me with big blue eyes. "Yeah they do," I answered. "My name's Tory," she said holding out her hand for me to shake. "I'm Gordo," I said shaking her hand.  
  
"You know who you kinda look like?" Tory said frowning. "Who?" I asked afraid to know the answer. "David Gordon, the director," she answered. "R-really, I never saw the resemblence," I said looking back out the window, not really wanting to talk anymore about, about, well myself.  
  
"Yeah, he's like, really hot. But he's twenty-seven, can you believe that? Mom say's he's too old for me, even though I'm eighteen. Do you think he's too old for me?" Tory rattled flipping her dark brown hair over her shoulder, obviously not getting the hint.  
  
"Uh, no, not at all," I said slouching several inches in my seat. "Ladies and gentlemen we are ready for take off, please fasten your seatbelts and put all seats and trays into the upright postition until the light indicates you may move about the cabin," came a friendly auto mated voice through the speakers overhead.  
  
I fastened my seat belt thankfull for the silence as the plane rolled down the runway and into the sky. I watched the pillars of clouds roll past us as we gained altitude.  
  
"So, why you headed to California?" Tory asked smaking away at her gum. "Um, highschool reunion," I mumbled flipping through one of the magazines that they had provided. "Really? Ten year, right? I mean, you don't look that old," she said shaking her head. "Yeah, ten year," I said reading an artical on Jennifer Lopez and her third husband.  
  
"Whoa, ten years since you last stepped foot in highschool, I'm just relieved to finally be out of it. That's why I'm headed for Cali, I'm going to UCLA. The past year has seemed like only days, that ten years must have went by fast for you," Tory said looking amazed.  
  
"Actually it's been the longest ten years of my life," I said quietly putting down the magazine. "Really? I can't imagine why?" Tory said with wide eyes. "Well after highschool I finally told the girl I had loved for my whole life my feelings, but then when we had to leave for college," I trailed off.  
  
I can't believe I'm telling this all to some teenage chatter box I just met, I thought as I choked out the rest, "When we had to leave for college, I promised her that we wouldn't grow apart, and that no matter what I would come back for her. But eventually we grew apart and I never went back for her, and I havn't talked to her in about thirteen years. But I couldn't help it, I was so caughht up in my work, all I heard day and night is Gordo be here, or Gordo change that. I never had time for myself. That was the only promise I ever broke, and I regret it to this day."  
  
Tory just sat there, silently staring at me. "You really loved her," she said quietly. I nodded, "I did."  
  
"Well you need to tell her that you still love her," Tory stated matter-of-factly. "It's not that easy you know, it's not like in the movies and in the books, life isn't like that," I argued.  
  
"Life, is your own book. And through what you just said it's sounded like your letting others write it for you. You can't let others write it for you, you have to write it for yourself," Tory argued taking a book she had been holding in her lap and waving it in my face.  
  
"It's not like that-" I began before she cut me off. "Yes, it is and you know it. You can let others write your story all you want, but eventually you have to write your own ending. 'Cause if you don't, your life is seriously screwed," Tory said turing to her book and letting her words sink in.  
  
I sat there blinking at her, I just had an argument about how I run my life with some eighteen year old I met fifeteen minutes ago, I thought shaking my head and looking out the window. Or at least that's what it looked like what I was doing, but every where I turned I saw Lizzie's face hover in front of me.  
  
I began thinking about the last things I said to her before we totally lost contact. I remembered our last phone call more than anything.  
  
(FLASHBACK)  
  
I sat staring at the phone. I have to call Lizzie, I thought. What I was about to say couldn't be told through an email. My fingers hovered over the phone keys, it had been so long since I called her, I wasn't sure if I even remembered the number.  
  
Fingers shaking, I slowly punched the numbers. It rang once, twice. "Please pick up," I mumbled quietly to myself. After the fourth ring it finally picked up. "Hello?" came a comforting voice from the other line.  
  
"Lizzie?" I said unable to control the smile that was fighting it's way to my lips. I heard her gasp, "Oh my gosh, Gordo, is that you?" she said excitedly. "Yeah it's me," I said.  
  
"Oh Gordo, I'm so glad you called," Lizzie said. I could hear a smie in her voice. "I'm glad you answered," I said pulling a small velvet box out of my pocket.  
  
"You will not believe how much is going on here," Lizzie said. "Really, like what?" I asked opening the box to reveal an engagement ring. "Well, first of all, there's this guy on the football team that like, passed out in the middle of a game because he was like, taking steriods or something. How stupid are people these days? And then..."  
  
I just sat there looking at the ring and enjoying the sound of her voice, I was afraid I had forgotten what it sounded like. Though the more she talked the more I felt the growing pain in my heart.  
  
I wanted to be there with her, sitting on the bed with her telling me about the kid who got attacked by pigeons and had to go to the hospital instead of here, miles away from her.  
  
Maybe I should just tell her now, and get it over with, I thought. "Lizzie," I said interupting her story about some kid who almost drown in the fountain. "What, is something wrong? Am I talking to much?" Lizzie said with worry in her voice.  
  
"No, no, I love hearing your voice. I just wanted to say, that I'm going to quit Harvard and go live in New York with you," I said. I heard silence on the other line except for some music that was playing softly in the background.  
  
"Gordo," Lizzie said, finally breaking the silence. "Yeah," I said leaning agains my bed. "Have you lost your mind? You can't qiut just like that. You've been dreaming about Harvard since middle school! Harvard is your dream! You can't quit, I won't let you!" she said yelling into the phone so I had to hold the reciever an arm's length away from my ear in order not to blow the ear drum.  
  
"But, Lizzie, I want to be with you in New York. I can't stand being this far away from you. I want to get married," I pleaded. "Gordo, I don't want you to give up your dream for me. As for getting married, we have plenty of time for that after college.  
  
"We've only been away for six months. If you don't stay in Harvard, then I won't marry you," she said stubbornly, even though I could hear the tears in her voice.  
  
"Lizzie, don't you want to get married and spend the rest of our lives together?" I asked. "Gordo, of course I want to get married. Right after college. And as for spending the rest of or lives together, we would do that even if we didn't get married," Lizzie reasoned.  
  
"Yeah, but if we never get married we'll never be able to-to, you know," I said slyly. "Gordo!" Lizzie laughed into the phone. "What?" I said innocently. "I'm ashamed of you, thinking such things," Lizzie said. "Sorry, but you can't tell me you don't think abouut it," I laughed. "Whatever, that's the end of that conversation," Lizzie said.  
  
"So, I have to stay here?" I groaned. "Yes, you stay there until we finish college and then we'll go back to Hillridge and take it from there," Lizzie said commandingly.  
  
"Fine. But I miss you, baby," I said. "Have I ever told you I love it when you call me that," Lizzie sighed. "No," I said putting the velvet box back in my pocket. "Well, I do," she said.  
  
There was a welcome silence for a while as we just listened to eachother breathe. "I love you, Gordo," Lizzie whispered. "I love you, too," I whispered closing my eyes.  
  
"It's thee o'clock here and I have classes at seven in the morning," Lizzie said yawning, "but I never want to hang up."  
  
"Me, neither," I groaned. "Lizzie, go to bed, you're keeping me up," I heard a voice say on the other line. "I gotta go," she groaned. "Okay, but do me a favor, and don't say goodbye," I said.  
  
"Okay, I won't. But remember your promise Gordo. We'll never grow apart and-"  
  
"I'll always come back to you," I finished for her. "I love you," she said quietly. "I love you too, baby," I said before we hung up.  
  
(END FLASHBACK)  
  
Sighing, I rested my forehead against the cool pexi glass. I was surprised Tory had decided to be quiet, relived yes, but surprised. My curiosity over took me and I snuck a glance at her to see why she was so quiet. I cringed when I saw various teen magazine's in her lap, all of which, I might add, had my face on it.  
  
How embarrasing, I thought to myself rubbing my temples. Taking a sip of the coke the flight attendent had just brought us I snuck a glance at the book Tory was reading and nearly choked.  
  
It read: "Promises Long Forgotten" by Elizabeth B. McGuire. "C-can I see that for a minute?" I asked motioning towards the book. "OH, yeah, sure," Tory said handing him the book.  
  
I turned to the inside of the back cover and saw a picture of Lizzie with a small paragraph under it that read:  
  
Elizabeth B. McGuire is the author of "Clueless" and the "Empty Promises" series as well as others. She currently resides in Hillrige California with her dogs Lily and Cassidy and her cat Gordo.  
  
I blinked a few times as I looked at her picture, she hadn't changed a bit. Still the same warm hazel eyes and luminous golden hair. Or at least I figured, it was a black and white picture after all.  
  
"She's a great writer," Tory commented as I handed the book back to her, "She also writes for Teen Scene magazine."  
  
"Please fasten your seat belts, we are about to land in Houston, Texas," came a voice through the overhead speakers. "I hate layovers," I mumbled to myself as I buckled up.  
  
We landed and loaded off the plane. Immediatly I went to a small bookstore that was nestled in a corner of the airport. Searching the shelves I found every book Lizzie had ever wrote and dumped it onto the counter.  
  
"The cashier looked up at me strangly as e rang them up. "So your a McGuire fan," he said looking at her picture on the back cover. "Uh, yeah," I said digging out my wallet. "She's an excellent writer," the cashier commented still gazing at her picture, "and she's not bad on the eyes either."  
  
I shifted uncomfortably as I resistred the urge to pound in his face to look at Lizzie the way he was. Reluctantly he put the book down and finished ringing me up. I paid him and hurried back to the terminal and sat in the waiting area.  
  
As soon as I sank into the cushy chair Tory came and sat next to me. "Hi," she said smiling. "Hi," I said awkwardly. She surveyed me up and down as I shifted uncomfortably in my chair.  
  
"You know, you really do look like him," she said holding a magizine next to my face. Snatching it from her hand I saw a picture of myself on the cover with a picture of Lindsey Lohan next to me. "Gordon and Lohan in love?" said the caption underneath.  
  
What a load of crap, I thought turning to the artical. It had a picture of me and Lindsey sitting at a restraunt and a picture of me and her walking down the street with my arm draped across her shoulders.  
  
"I'm so jealous of her," Tory said reading over my shoulder, "She's so lucky she get's to go out with him, I would do anything to be his girlfriend."  
  
"We're not going out," I couldn't help but say, "Uh, I mean, they're not going out." Tory's eyes narrowed as I handed her back her magazine. "You are him aren't you?" she accused. "Uh, no, we look nothing alike. He's way uglier," I mentioned.  
  
Suddenly Tory pushed my left arm sleeve to my shoulder. "Hey," I said trying to push it back down. "Aha! You are him! You are David Gordon! she said triuimphantly before I put my hand over her mouth.  
  
"Ssh, not so loud, I whispered hastily. "So you are him, you admit it," she said smiling as I lowered my hand. "Yes," I mumbled only to have her squeal loudly. "I put my hand back over her mouth, "Control yourself woman, I don't want to be mobbed," I said, "Now, promise to control yourself?" Tory nodded her head vigorously and I slowly lowered my hand, ready to snap it back to her mouth in an instant.  
  
Tory sat there with a huge grin on her face, "Your birthmark on your shoulder gave it all away. You should really put makeup on it or something," she said. "Yeah, I'll be sure to next time," I mumbled.  
  
"I can't believe your David Gordon, the hottest guy on the face of this earth," Tory gushed. "Yeah, me neither," I sighed. "Can I youch you?" she breathed. "Uh, sure," I said uneasidly.  
  
Tory clutched my arm and looked up at me with wide eyes, "Can I have your autograph?" she asked thrusting her magazine into my hands. I signed it and handed it back to her, and suddenly she was the same Tory I had met on the plane and not some crazed fan.  
  
"Why'd you buy all those Elizabeth B. books?" Tory asked admiring the cover of her magazine. "You know the girl I told you about on the plane?" I asked. Tory nodded. "That's her," I said staring at the back cover of the book to gaze upon Lizzie's face.  
  
"No, way," Tory gasped. "Yes, way," I said nodding. "I don't believe you," she said stubbornly. "Here, I'll prove it, I said reaching into my pocket to get my wallet.  
  
I opened the wallet and took out a small, slightly faded picture of Lizzie. Smoothing out the creases I handed it to Tory. She stared at it for a while befrore handing it back. "So this means I have no chance of going out with you, huh?" she joked smiling a bit. I nodded, "Sorry."  
  
"Flight 206 Texas to LA now boarding," rang through the narrow halls. Sighing, I grabbed my carry on and walked onto the plane with Tory following closely.  
  
"What seat are you?" Tory asked looking down at her ticket. "23G" I murmered as we squeezed through the narrow ailse. "Oh cool, I'm 24G," she said. We found our seats and took off for LA.  
  
I won't leave without making everything right again, I thought as I gaved out the window, I won't leave without Lizzie.  
  
A/n:Well there ya go, ill try and get the next chap up soon. mel 


	5. What If Lizzie

**Chapter 5: What If**

**Lizzie**

I sat on the edge of my bed looking out the window. I had a blanket wrapped around my body and a mug of coffee warming my hands. The events of last night kept replaying in my head, and it hurt even more every time.

The phone rang and I picked it up. "Hello," I said in a monotone voice. "Liz? You feeling okay? You didn't look to good when I left last night," Tom said. "I'm fine," I replied dryly.

"Okay, well, I'm in Denver right now. I just wanted to make sure you we-"

"I said I'm okay, Cory," I said sharply, I didn't need to be bothered with this right now. "Oh," Cory said sounding a bit taken back, "Well, I'll call you tomorrow. I love you."

I opened my mouth to reply but my tongue felt like lead. I couldn't tell him that I loved him. "Bye," I whispered and hung up. I couldn't tell my fiancee that I loved him.

The rain pounded against the window, reminding me all too much of the last night I spent in Gordo's arms.

FLASHBACK

The rain pattered melodiously against the roof in what seemed like perfect harmony with the beat of Gordo's heart. It was our first spring break from college and Gordo flew out to New York to see me.

We were laying on my bed in the dorm after Gordo took my out to dinner and I showed him around the campus. We talked about anything and everything, from classes to food. Sometimes just sitting in silence, but that was enough for us, we just needed the presence of the other.

"Lizzie," Gordo began, breaking the silence. "Yes," I said snuggling further into his chest. "Remember that night on the phone a few months ago?" I thought for a minute before answering, "Yeah."

"Well, Lizzie, I thought about what we said, about waiting to get married," he pulled away from me, leaving my fingers grasping at air. He got on the floor on one knee and reached into his pocket.

"Lizzie, I love you, so much. And I can't stand not being with you, to not be able to hold you or kiss you," he said as he brought out a small velvet box from his pocket, "More that anything, I want to be able to see you every day and tell you to your face how much I love you."

Tears blurred my vision as he finished. "Lizzie, I want you to be my wife. So will you marry me?" he asked.

"Oh, Gordo," I said wiping away my tears. I grasped his shoulders and placed him on the bed. "Gordo, I love you so much. And I want to be your wife," I began sitting on his lap, "But more than anything, I want you to finish college. I don't want you to give up your dreams for me."

I set my hands over his and closed the box. "Just three more years," I said resting my forehead against his, "I'm sorry."

I felt him sigh and I placed my head in the crook of his neck. "But what if you don't want to marry me after college?" he questioned, "What if you find someone else?"

"Gordo, I could never find anybody who could even begin to measure up to you," I said, "You will always be the one and only person for me."

Gordo smiled and kissed the tip of my nose. "Then can you do me one favor?" he asked. "Anything," I said running my hand through his mass of curls.

"Can you wear this?" he said pulling the ring out of it's velvet shell, "as a sort of promise ring. A promise that no matter what, after I get on that plane tomorrow morning, I will always come back for you. I will come back to you and we'll get married and spend every moment of the rest of our lives together."

He slid the ring on my finger. At that moment I couldn't help but smile. I was practically engaged! And to the greatest man on the face of the earth.

I kissed him deeply and he gladly responded. I ran my tongue along his bottom lip, begging his mouth to open.

We finally pulled apart for air. "Lizzie, did you really mean it when you said you could never love anyone like you love me?" Gordo asked.

"Of course," I panted, "I couldn't even imagine loving someone the way I love you. I will never marry another."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

END FLASHBACK

I rested my head in my shaking hands. All these memories. Why were they haunting me now? Nine years later? Why? Why...

Now I couldn't help but wonder, what if I had said yes nine years ago? One simple yes could have changed everything. I wouldn't be sitting here wondering what if. I would have been living it.

I looked down at my left hand and saw my engagement ring to Tom. Then it hit me. I broke my promise to Gordo. I will never marry another I had said. Now look at me, engaged to someone who wasn't Gordo.

Suddenly the ring seemed suffocating and I pulled it off. I set it on the night stand and looked wildly about the room. I still had Gordo's promise ring, I had to have it.

I ran over to my trunk and opened the heavy lid. A certain, comforting musty smell filled my nostrils as I searched it. It was this trunk I had used to bury all the memories I had of him. I used this trunk to get rid of my sorrows, to get rid of all the love I still stored for him.

With every item I pulled out of the trunk I pulled another memory out with it. My cat sat on the end of the bed, his green eyes glowing bright against his black fur as he observed me in my toil. My Border Collie, Cassidy, rested her head on the edge of the box, peering intently at the various items while my Sheltie just sat in her usual bored manner on the edge of the bed.

I pulled out everything you could imagine, old shirts of Gordo's I had borrowed and never returned, a jacket also Gordo's which I never returned, and even a hotel towel among the few. With every item came a memory tumbling out of her heart that was thought to be lost forever.

A bolt of lightening eliminated the dark room and I noticed a small wooden box in the corner of the old trunk. I lifted it out ans set it on my lap. For a moment I just sat there, running my fingers along the oak surface and across the picture of me ad Gordo plastered on the front. I actually remembered the picture. It was a candid one that Miranda took the summer before college.

Gordo stood behind me with his arms around my waist. I had one hand on his cheek and my body was twisted around for a kiss. I remembered those time. Everything seemed so perfect, I couldn't imagine my life another way. Everywhere I looked I had seen Gordo. I saw him in my yesterdays, todays and tomorrows. Now, he was merely a yesterday.

I opened the box and sighed. On top of all the photographs of us together, the movie ticket stubs, letters from Gordo, was the ring. The stone glittered in the dull light and it's delicate band still shined after all these years.

I pulled it slowly from the box and held it in front of me. I just held it to my chest and cried. Cried for Gordo. Cried for living a false love. Cried for a past love. Most of all, I cried for what the ring stood for. Broken promises, and promises never spoken.


End file.
